Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Blog post I left on a freinds blog (using a moniker)

As a single mom, I really want to say something about single parenthood.

Despite all of the hurdles and obstacles our little ohana has been through, I gotta say that my kids have turned out great.

They turned out that way, because I made a decision not to allow men, drugs, alchohol and bad people into our lives, and have kept my word on that. My kids mean way more to me then any personal relationship with anyone else.

They turned out that way because I stopped trying to stuff their heads full of empty religious dogma, but allow them to act upon their own good natures and common sense of humanity.

I don't allow others around our little ohana who make trouble and cause dissension. Do that, and you do not have an invitation to our lives. Period.

This allows my kids to decide for themselves when kids they hang out with may not be good for them, and they have both done an excellent job from weeding out those whose friendships that do not enhance them as human beings. (Although sometimes I do voice my opinion on the matter! :D)

In our house there is freedom of speech, although sometimes I do feel the need to editorialize from time to time.

This teaches them to stand up for themselves and others in a world where arguing and debate has become a national spectator sport.

But they have gotten really really good! Sometimes it sounds like Glenn Beck and Keith Obierman around our house.

But in the end we always hug and make up. And we love each other very much.

Also, both of my children have grown up with the idea to make themselves and their lives better. They have learned not to make my mistakes, while hopefully taking my best qualities and integrating them into their best qualities.

They are strong minded and independent thinkers, who both have their own individual lives, pursuits, ideas, friends, beliefs and accomplishments. They are each unique individuals, and I am very proud of both of them.

I care where my kids are, who they are with and what they are doing. That to me is being a good parent. Too many parents have no idea where the kids are or who they are with or what they are doing.

I make sure that I have a good support system of family and friends, and know where to go in the community should I or the kids need help.

The election of a President that had a single mother for a parent and was raised by grandparents, swayed me more than the color of anyones skin. I felt that finally the case against single kids being the scourge of the world because they were raised by single parents was over.

Its time to take a new look at single parenthood, outline the successes of many kids who turn out not only just fine, but exceptional. I think that my two kids are a perfect case in point.

And they are not exceptions either. Kids of single parents do great things every day in our communities. We don't give them, or the parents the respect they deserve. And that includes all single parents, dads too.

Let us hope, that the first President raised by a single mom, and grandparents who struggled to give him a good education, and whose mother pierced his consciousness with a desire to do good for people all over the world, and here in our country is treated with the respect he deserves.

With that respect, comes respect for my two kids as well. Without that respect, and that dignity afforded to kids of single parents, people that tend to think discriminatory fashion and in a prejudiced way against them will continue to undermine the successes and glorify the failures.

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